I’m a single mother. I’m very proud of my accomplishments given the background I came from. I’ve come a long way and it has been a wonderful learning experience. The thought of parenting used to be kind of scary to me. As a teenager with a younger sister I used to fear the craziness they embodied. “If this is what kids are like, I don’t want them” is what I honestly felt.

During my first pregnancy I didn’t have that joyful expecting mother experience. The kind where you’re immediately bonded to your child and you anticipate this little person growing inside you to fulfill all the dreams you’ve created in your head. I wondered if there was something wrong with me but I was young and ignorant, if you will. I didn’t think about the future. I feared the labor that I’d face more than anything. I never thought I had a high tolerance for pain but having a baby might have changed that idea.

I had an amazing experience during the birth of my first child. All those worries I had during the pregnancy went away in a flash. Upon instant eye contact with my baby I fell in love. There are no words to express the feelings I experienced in that moment but I can tell you this much; I grew up REAL fast and embraced motherhood right then and there. I have vowed from that moment to protect my child. Teach them about the world, about people and who they want to be. I wanted to share all the things I loved and teach them to be great people; respectable citizens, individuals, and independent. There are a lot of things I want for my children. I truly feel becoming a parent saved me. I don’t know who or what kind of person I’d be had I not gone through this journey.

My children are now teenagers. I have a lot of work to do before they leave for a life of their own but I have full confidence they will adapt and do just fine. They know I will help them in any way I can and if I can’t, I will help them figure it out, together. They’ll never be alone, not as long as I’m still breathing. We are very close. They make me proud every day. I embrace every day I have with them because I know it won’t be long until they go out into the world on their own. It’s kind of scary but I know I have to let them go. I want so much for them to find happiness and success in their lives. That’s just what a parent does.

There are so many things I wanted to do before I became a parent but I’ve come to this comfort…I’m still young and healthy enough to do them and I will! There’s a whole other journey I’ll be able to experience when they move away. It’s like when they first go to school, you try to figure out what you’re going to do with yourself haha but you figure it out. It’s just another chapter in my life to embrace.


One Response to {Parenting}

  1. Megan McCleary says:

    This moves me to want to be a better parent and I already wanted that, now I need to make sure I follow through. I hope to be half the mom you are and I will pray every day that I do it right so that my son (and any future kids) turn out to be half the kids your two amazing kids turned out to be!

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